Perfect Storm: After the Roar

For two days, I sat through my category one hurricane of autoimmune and spinal cord disease. More than once, I remembered my experience with hurricane Hermine.

I was reminded of her pervasive stillness–after her roar. Those are days I will not forget. I’m not remembering their inconvenience–it was so minor–it is the meditative state, the calm after the storm that stays with me.

In this recent health hurricane, the roar does not last as long as the calm. For two days, I was more in the meditative state than not. Still am.

I hasten to add that I had some outside help. Both my landline phones and my laptop signed off, the phones permanently.

So far, with my limited technology knowledge, I am able to bring back the laptop, from time to time. The phones are another matter.

There was a time this technology failure would have been a thud in my stomach–the churning and burning would start–creating my own stress, actually triggering a chronic illness flare-up.we-are-everything-0413

Perhaps it is fortunate that my health hurricane preceded the technology demise. I will never know. Regardless, my storm was perfect enough.

I don’t always accept impermanence with this level of ease. It may be that the experience of hurricane Hermine helped me sit still and wait for the roar to cease. The intermittent use of technology also kept things quiet.

We do not lack inner resources but sometimes we are so wired to the world, we forget we have them. Speaking of, I found I had another set of landline phones— two out of three batteries held a charge–one small red dot became two, together a sliver of light.

I ordered a laptop.

Sometimes, it just takes a perfect storm.

Aim for Even posts offer equanimity in daily doses. No day or dose is ever the same, even if the aim is. You may read about the origins of Aim for Even here or on this site’s About page. 

 

 

 

2 thoughts on “Perfect Storm: After the Roar

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  1. Karen – again, you’re an inspiration. It’s always intrigued me how unrelated adverse events concatenate: to our minds appearing as a ‘bad luck’ pattern that serves only to drive stress. As you point out, we have to accept the moment. I have my own storm happening just now, in which much that I thought was certain has been overturned. Small and unrelated matters become disproportionate at such times. You’re right, we have to accept it calmly. All the best for a quick resolution to your tech issues.

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    1. I do find comfort in concatenation much as I do impermanence. More and more, I believe everything is connected, and I mean everything, so as I make connections between seemingly unrelated events, I am reminded that impermanence is a wave. It will go ashore.

      There are storms that never seemed to stop swirling. I know. Seeing patterns gives me a sense of the storm. I know there is no controlling it, and sometimes, I do feel powerless. It is in accepting that the storm is my moment that I am reminded no experience lasts. I like to think I am better in the blue sky days as well.

      You are in my thoughts, Matthew.
      Karen

      Liked by 1 person

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